Blackberry Babes………… (Fact or Fiction)

17 Jun

Being a Nigerian has its perks. You are allowed to be a critic without any discernible qualifications. Probably its because of the arrogance…….(don’t start looking shocked,you know you can be arrogant at times)….or could it be our ever evolving taste? Eventually we will find out before Hell finally freezes over………… Anyways,i digress. It is without a doubt that majority of Nigerians have indulged in watching the flick, ‘Blackberry Babes’, as well as its subsequent sequel titled ‘Return of the Blackberry Babes’. For 9 years plus, I have not watched a single Nollywood flick till the arrival of BBB. I say this without an ounce of regret. When watching a movie,i have evolved from just sitting back and having a good view………… My joy comes from every angle. From production to editing and cast selection…..down to the very soundtrack interface. Nollywood however, is sorely lacking in this department. Its like a frigid woman. No matter how much you caress it………you just can’t get an orgasm. However,when I watched the trailer(or something of the sort),i had no choice but to be intrigued by the hilarity of ‘Apollonia’ and the endowed nature of Keisha’s rear. In a matter of days,one of my faithful followers on Twitter sent me a link and I began viewing. (since I am in Ukraine,i had no time for popcorn………… I settled for ‘Simechkiy’) . After watching both parts of BBB………… I laughed. I laughed so hard,that I feared an aneurysm was en route. What in the highest of fuck was this? There were so many things wrong with it.
-massive grammatical blunders
-tasteless sex scenes
-‘over phonerization’
………………………….. Amongst other things.
I still had a good laugh though,but I was appalled by the production. The plot actually had promise,but I was wondering why it would end when I was just getting a hang of the story line. If I had known, I would have kept my thoughts to myself.

Return of the Blackberry Babes was nothing more than the return of nonsense. That movie just proved that sequel formation in Nollywood is messed up. The metamorphosis of the storyline was bumpy,tasteless and downright tautological. However,let us digress a bit… as much that i am appalled by the production of the film, it is the state of mind of the viewers that give me pause. Its as if their idea of a good movie involves the collation of overacting and under-production. Needless to say……not only should the producers of such flicks be admonished…..the viewers should be cautioned as well. How can you watch such a movie and call it ‘amazing’ or ‘making sense’? I see such comments and i ask myself….”did we watch the same thing?”….

However,in conclusion, as much as i find the whole production of Blackberry Babes,i believe some of the cast require a standing Ovation. Especially the leading starlets ;Oge Okoye(Damisa) and Tonto Dike(Vivian). They made me hate their guts and that is an accomplishment for an actor/actress. I pointed out the issue of exaggeration in the movie,but come to think of it….is it that far from the truth? Don’t ladies, and a lot of guys as well, use the ownership of a Blackberry Phone as some sort of social status standing? In reality,i have met a lot of girls who have behaved even worse than Damisa……so the movie gets points for ”eye opening”. However………the worst thing Nollywood can hit me with now would be another movie titled ”Blackberry Boys” or something even more appalling like ”Blackberry Babes vs Blackberry Boys”. Nollywood………….please next time you do a crappy movie……don’t write ”To God be the Glory”…..Jehovah will vex for you.

P.S. What in the world is the soundtrack department doing?
…………………..Heb Cwyr

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Posted by on June 17, 2011 in Uncategorized


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